Ok, it's later...

Things didn't go quite as planned earlier, but here's the situation in a nutshell.

First, transition in the workplace. That's the part that didn't go as planned. I won't have the chance to address it again until Monday (hopefully) but it would seem that I am going to be instructing part time like I had planned before. I just don't know how to maintain part time employment (read: if they let me) until I talk to them. I need that job because of the insurance.

Which brings me to the next part. Hmm, come to think of it, I don't really know a whole lot about that, either. Alright, let's try this. For the past two months I've been having a problem with weird twitching and various voluntary muscles moving involuntarily. It happens on average 40 times a day. Then count in the muscle weakness and opposite reactions. Opposite as in, dropping something I thought I was holding tightly or having my hand contract spasmodically on something I was holding lightly, like a piece of paper. Anyway, the initial neurologist appointment leaves me somewhat hopeful. There is something going on, seemingly along with another problem that I didn't even know I had; however, he isn't alarmed and doesn't think it's a major neurological/muscle/nerve disease. They took nine vials of blood yesterday. Oh, and I peed in a cup (a little anyway). The next test (an EMG) is in three weeks. That little gem consists of the doc sticking needles in my muscles and running electric currents through. (Anyone else thinking Bride of Frankenstein?) The hope is to determine what caused the nerve damage in my legs, if it's reversible, and just what in the hell is making my muscles hop around erratically like Mexican jumping beans.

So, that's why I need the insurance. I'm hoping they permit me to work part time because right now, there's a good chance my brain might short circuit if they don't. This is a big enough thing to try to cope with as I won't have any answers for at least another month when the EMG is done. The instructing job will be ALOT easier on my body and perhaps the symptoms wouldn't be so bad if I weren't taking a beating as a tech every day. The job as a tech, though, is where the insurance comes from. This means I have to divulge most of this to them and I don't like that, but it's my best chance of actually having them work with me.

This is partially why I've backed off on blogging and emails and such. Often, when I try to type, my fingers won't cooperate. I spend more time hitting the backspace key and trying to massage the fatigue out of my fingers. Then, it makes it worse the following day since my fingers have been pushed to their limit - I drop more things and have increased hand spasms. You know, there are many people that would wish that could happen to my mouth every now and then, that I'd voluntarily give it a rest! ;)

So. I'm a little relieved, more than a bit nervous, and impatient as hell for more than one reason regarding this whole situation. I will say though that for the first time in my life, I had steaming coconut cappucinno. Yum! When I go back in three weeks, I'll make sure to have another. A little sweeter than I'd opt for but really, really good. Hey, you can't forget about the small pleasures, especially in the midst of tough times. Guess I might be smart to ask for two lids to get an extra tight seal on the cup lid because of the twiching!

For now, I need sleep. Over the weekend I'll be catching up with everyone; take care.
~